How were the team feeling ahead of this game Freddie?
“ Hi, yeah I was feeling pretty confident after last week’s triumph, with a bit of swagger walking out onto the field. I was however, a bit concerned about a potential dip to my goals tally, as I had a bit of a sore hip picked up from a super intense game of Frisbee over the weekend”
Nice, and the team?
“Yeah the lads were up for it, a bit nervous of the pitch however, it was a very slippy astro-turf which made both dodging and our usual trademark pressured defence hard to execute. We just wanted to turn up and do the job really, just business-like. Head in the freezer heart in the fire as I always say.
And can you tell me a bit about the game itself?
“ As I said it was a tricky one unaccustomed to the surface, and frightfully cold, quite end to end stuff and a bit scrappy by the end. I got really cold so was a DNF. But the boys ground out a win, though not quite in the fashion we were used to, we will be looking forward to the return fixture on good old Coombe Dingle’s 3G next week.”
Man of the Match and Dick of the Day?
“ Honestly this one hurts me to my core. I don't want to get personal but Nadin definitely deserved DOTD cos he’s gone veggie and got a chicken burger at Maccies’ after (Don't worry Guy, I’m performance so I didn’t), among other stuff. Sadly my mentor Harry Parker was wrongfully awarded it because of Nadin’s Stalin like grip over Hans’s vote.. MOTM went to the whole team.”
 Freddie later admitted he got this phrase out of a bathroom quote book.